What Are Men, BF, Husbands Like!

**

**

A cyclone hit a Kansas farmhouse just before dawn one morning.

It tore off the roof, and picked up the beds on which the farmer and his wife slept were sleeping.  By some miracle, the cyclone set them down unharmed the next county over.

The wife was sobbing uncontrollably.  “Don’t be scared, Mary,” her husband said.  “We’re not hurt.”

Mary continued to cry.  “I’m not scared,” she said between sobs.  “I’m happy…  this is the first time in 14 years we’ve been out together.”

**

**

Wife leaves a note on the fridge: “I have made all attempts. It’s not working. 
I can’t take it anymore. I am going to stay at my Mom’s place!!  😡 😥

Husband opens the fridge, checks the beer bottle. Feels it is cold. He takes a few big gulps from the bottle. Feels it is chilled.

Then says to himself, “What the hell is she talking about??? Fridge is working fine!!”

**

**

End

Source: 100% சிரிப்பு இலவசம் , Santabanta.com, Quora, Usha Narayanan and rays-daily.com/

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All The World Loves A Loser!

‘Ayushman Bharat Scheme’ is a recently announced medicare scheme:

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An Open Door

Benjamin is in the midst of a long dry spell in Las Vegas. Eventually he gambles away all his money and has to borrow a quarter from another gambler just to use the men’s room. He finds a stall that happens to be open and pockets the quarter.

Believing that his luck has finally changed, he puts the quarter in a slot machine and hits the jackpot. He takes his winnings and goes to the blackjack table and turns his modest winnings into a million dollars. 

Wealthy beyond his wildest dreams, Benjamin goes on the lecture circuit, where he tells his incredible story. He tells his audiences that he will always be eternally grateful to his benefactor, and if he ever finds the man he will share his fortune with him.

After months of speaking, a man in the audience jumps up and says, “I’m that man. I was the one who gave you the quarter.”

“Yes, I remember you well, but you aren’t the one I’m looking for. I mean the guy who left the stall door open!”

**

Jones jumped up from the card table white with rage.  “Stop this game,” he shouted, “Smith is cheating!”

“How do you know?”

“He’s not playing the hand I dealt him.”

**

End

Source: santabanta.com

It’s A Sure Sign Of Trouble In Festive Season When…

you go some place on a set of wheels…

Lights up, first!

Now for the some words of sage advice from one who has been there:

A warning to all you drivers, be careful about drunk driving as we’re getting close to Christmas and Police are out there checking on people.

Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing lead to another and I had a few too many cocktails and then went onto the wine. Not a good idea.

Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my car at the pub and took a bus home.

Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint, where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalyzer tests. Because I was in a Bus they just waved it past.

I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I’ve never driven a bus before and I am not even sure where I got it from.

…and return by another.

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Source: santabanta.com. The image is entirely of a different kind: Bus driver shocked by praise after kindness to homeless man.

Connecting The Dots On Social Media

About This And That

You know you had too many inspirational stories of a kind when:

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Nostalgia

Those were the days…

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Watch Out…Could Happen To You!

‘Doctor, please help my dad, his eyes have gotten like this over the past few months.’

Ailment

MD: ‘You must take him to a ophthalmologist.  He may need a scan. I know a good guy in Colaba with all the equipment…will give you a note. Do it asap before it gets worse.’

‘But, doctor, we live in Borivili and Colaba is land’s end on the other side…’

‘Look, if you’re serious about getting him treated…that’ll be 2000 rupees.’

In a few days, Uncle visiting from Thirupparaithurai: ‘Hey, whatever happened to him? He was perfectly normal when I saw him last.’

‘It’s a long story, Uncle – must have happened gradually that we didn’t notice it at all until one day…’

‘Has he been watching English movies on TV?’

‘How did you know? Lately, yes, a lots of them.’

‘Show him Hindi movies…this is what happens watching movies with subtitles.’

 

End

 

 

 

Source: santabanta.com’

What Are Wives Like…

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