Monday Mirth

Good Samaritan

A devastated-looking man knocks on the door of a woman known for her charity.

“Please, ma’am,” he says when she opens up, “can you help this poor, tragic family down the block? The father just lost his job, and his wife is too ill to work. They’re about to be turned out into the cold streets unless someone can pay their rent.”

“That’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life!” says the woman.

“May I ask who you are sir?”

“Their landlord.”

Did Johnny get it right?

Teacher: If I gave you 2 oranges and another 2 oranges and another 2, how many will you have?

Johnny: Seven, Sir.

Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 oranges, and another 2 oranges and another 2, how many will you have?

Johnny: Seven.

Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you 2 apples, and another 2 apples and another 2, how many will you have?

Johnny: Six.

Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 oranges, and another 2 oranges and another 2, how many will you have?

Johnny: Seven!!!

An angry Teacher: Where the in the heavens do you get seven from?

Very angry Johnny: Because I’ve already got an orange in my lunch-box!!!

Equal partners in life

A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do.

And a woman must do what he can’t.

(Rhonda Hansome) .
.
Soul Food

If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything. (Mark Twain)

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do. (Apple Inc.)

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. (Mark Twain)

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. (Albert Einstein)

The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference. (Elie Wiesel) .
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End .
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Sources: Credits to Steve (http://fellowshipofminds.wordpress.com), Enjoythemasti@yahoogroups.com , Prof HBK, openclipart.org (JZA, aungkarns, jogdragoon) and goodreads.com.

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8 Responses to Monday Mirth

  1. Johnny is sure cute and true 🙂
    poor teacher!

    Like

  2. OyiaBrown says:

    Reblogged this on OyiaBrown.

    Like

  3. Sharmishtha says:

    Reblogged this on Thoughts.

    Like

  4. Prashant says:

    refreshing !

    Like

  5. Asifa Zunaidha says:

    loved it 🙂 jokes and especially the quotes of Mark Twain

    Like

  6. so you have missed last monday!

    Like

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