Monday Masti

Texas beer joint sues Church


In Mt. Vernon, Texas, Drummond’s Bar began construction on expansion of their building to increase their business.

In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the bar from expanding with petitions and prayers. Work progressed rightup until the week before the grand reopening when lightning struck the bar and it burned to the ground!

After the bar burning to the ground by a lightning strike, the church folks were rather smug in their outlook, bragging about “the power of prayer,” until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.

In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building’s demise.

The judge read through the plaintiff‘s complaint and the defendant’s reply, and at the opening hearing he commented,

“I don’t know how I’m going to decide this, but it appears from the paperwork that we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that now does not.”

(An old classic revived by Steve)

It’s simple…


Teacher: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

Glen: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

Goofy shakes up


New employee on the first day of work, worked till late evening on the computer.

Boss was happy and asked what he was doing the whole evening.

New Employee: “Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright!”

Break-through anti-ageing formula


Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them during driving.

The story that went awry


In Lok Sabha (Lower House of the Indian Parliament), a Congress Member (of the ruling party) during his speech told a story…..

“There was a father who gave 100 rupees each to his 3 sons and asked them to buy things and fill up a room completely.

First son bought hay for Rs. 100 but couldn’t fill the room entirely.

Second son bought cotton for Rs. 100 but couldn’t fill the room entirely.

Third son bought a candle for Rs. 1 and lit it up and the room was filled with light completely.”

The MP added “Our Prime Minister is like the third son. From the day he has taken charge of his office, our country is filled with the bright light of prosperity”

A voice from the backbench asked “Where is the remaining Rs. 99??”

(The backdrop is scam-a-day governance, no political party excepted)
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Soul Food

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. (Mark Twain)

There is a sufficiency in the world for man’s need but not for man’s greed. (Mahatma Gandhi)

Skill is the unified force of experience, intellect and passion in their operation. (John Ruskin)

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. (Soren Kierkegaard)

Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment. (Fred Brooks)


Frederick Phillips Brooks, Jr. (born April 19, 1931) is a software engineer and computer scientist, best known for managing the development of IBM’s System/360 family of computers and the OS/360 software support package, then later writing candidly about the process in his seminal book The Mythical Man-Month. Brooks has received many awards, including the National Medal of Technology in 1985 and the Turing Award in 1999.

It was in The Mythical Man-Month that Brooks made the now-famous statement: “Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.” This has since come to be known as the Brooks’s law. In addition to The Mythical Man-Month, Brooks is also known for the paper No Silver Bullet: Essence and Accidents of Software Engineering.

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Sources: Grateful thanks to Steve (fellowshipofminds.wordpress.com), groups.yahoo.com/group/enjoythemasti/, openclipart.org/, funfunky.com, Facebook (Srikant Misra), brainyquote.com, amazing-animations.com, img.wikinut.com and Wiki

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8 Responses to Monday Masti

  1. Wonderful! Thank you for the smiles and chuckles! (p.s…. The animated gif of the lightning is not working because you resized it. If you take it back to it’s original size, it will work okay on the post. Otherwise, it only works when you click on it. I don’t know if this is just a wordpress thing, or if they’re like that anytime an animated gif is inserted.)

    Like

    • tskraghu says:

      Thanks, my friend, for pointing out a way. I thought it was just WP’s quirk. I tried to get it at its original size ended up with repeated IO Errors. The gif is large – 3 mb. Will try again.

      Like

      • When you inserted it, did you reduce the size? Or leave it as original? If you left it the same size as your upload it should work. Yeah, some gif’s can be pretty large. I’ve had to go through and reduce a few before. GIMP is really good for that.

        Like

  2. tskraghu says:

    I thought I left it as it is – since it looked small on Steve’s page.

    Like

  3. your wit and sense of humour is par excellence. your monday posts are magical.

    Like

  4. Sharmishtha says:

    Reblogged this on Thoughts.

    Like

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