To All, Rise Against This Cruelty To Women

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Nasiruddin, The Outliar

Mulla Nasiruddin’s tales like Akbar-Birbal’s and Tenali Raman’s are short and witty and some  downright outrageous, all the same enjoyable. Here’s one such:

nasrudinsblog.wordpress com.jpg

On a particularly cold night, Nasiruddin was stretching his legs in front of a dying fire,

He was joined by a villager given to gross exaggeration and sometimes outright lies. Much as he would have liked, Nasiruddin could do little to avoid him. It wasn’t long before the villager launched himself in full flow.

‘You know, these don’t bother me,’ he said punching the hard mattress Nasiruddin was sitting on.

‘Don’t understand why should my mattress bother anyone save me.’

‘This kind of dried grass is quite beneath me.’

‘But that’s where a mattress belongs – beneath you?’

Nasiruddin’s levity or naivety, whatever, was roundly ignored.

The villager rolled on: ‘Under the circumstances, I sleep over the air.’

‘Eh?’

’Yes, I simply levitate.’

‘Oh!’

Obviously it called for an explanation that was supplied without any encouragement: ‘I learnt it a few months ago from an itinerant Baba!’

‘Very interesting! And what a coincidence it would be if he was the same guy who taught me to see in the dark. Was he one eyed, toothless and in white robes?’

It was villager’s turn to be nonplussed: ‘Seeing in the dark? Really? Then…why would you do that?’

‘Do what?’

‘But I’ve seen you go out in the night always carrying a lighted lamp in hand – never without it.’

‘Oh, at my age collisions could be nasty, you’ll agree – a fall can break a bone or two. So the lamp – it’s for others to stay clear off me.’

The villager suddenly remembered at that instant he had to be elsewhere.

End

 

 

Source: Adapted from speakingtree.in and image from  nasrudinsblog.wordpress.com

Check out Agnijaat the ezine and make me happy folks!

A great effort single-handedly pulled off by good e-friend and a prodigious writer Sharmishtha. Do peruse it and give her the benefit of your views and encouragement. Thank you.

Thoughts

Second Issue of Agnijaat is out, it was published on 18.8.16, it is a monthly ezine containing essays, stories, poems, photographs, and other secret stuffs!

A creative effort of Sharmishtha Basu, an attempt to capture your hearts, try it out guys! No harm can come from that! 

This magazine is much more direct than my blogs, because everything is not meant for everyone, that is a lesson I have learnt well through my years of blogging. So, I keep some for those who are a little more serious readers. Agnijaat contains and will contain those works.

Be the wind under its wings 

Right now, if you want to read Shravan and Bhadra Issue write to me (Sharmishthabasu@hotmail.com cc sermistabasu@gmail.com), I will send you the pdf for mere 1$, if you want it for free then you will have to promise a critic for it, I will be immensely…

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A Leader’s Game

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That’s what I call it.

A ‘smart’ leader is never the first to cross the bridge.

What bridge? He even gets them to be the bridge for him!

What is your take?

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Source: Friends For Us at facebook.com/groups/101024580247213/ (here)

 

 

 

 

 

Pulling Legs? Oh, No…

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A Traveler’s Choice

Sanmargam

A woman was traveling in the mountains.

On the way she found a large sapphire stone in a stream.

The next day she was joined by another traveler, a professional prospector who appeared to be long gone without luck. And, food.

The woman broke her journey, paused under a tree, opened her bag and shared her bread.

The famished traveler came back to life.

As they got ready to resume their interrupted journey, the traveler noticed the precious stone inside her bag.

His eyes bulged. He requested the woman to take it out and show him. He was ‘salivating’ as he held it in his hand.

PROSPECTING myyellowknifenow com

Looking at his excitement, the woman readily offered for him to have the stone all for himself.   Delighted at this unexpected turn of fortune, he took the stone and made a hasty departure for the fear of the woman changing her mind. He…

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Who’s Most Wily Among Us? (In Hindi)

Hands timeanddate com

एक अंग्रेज ट्रेन से सफ़र कर रहा था …..
सामने एक बच्चा बैठा था…
अंग्रेज ने बच्चे से पूछा यहाँ सबसे ज्यादा खतरनाक कौन सी समाज हैं ???
बच्चा:” महाराष्ट्रीयन,पंजाबी, गुजराती, हरयाणवी,और सबसे ज्यादा तो यूपीवाले
[कुछ देर पश्चात]
अंग्रेज : ‘मैं कैसे जान सकता हूँ कि कौन सा व्यक्ति कितना खतरनाक है ?’
बच्चा: ‘बैठा रह शान्ति से … अभी दस घंटे के सफ़र में सबसे मिलवा दूंगा’….

कुछ ही देर बाद हरियाणा का एक चौधरी मूंछों पे ताव देता हुआ बैठ गया ।
बच्चा: ‘भाई ये हरियाणवी है …’
अंग्रेज : ‘इससे बात कैसे करूँ?’
बच्चा: “चुपचाप बैठा रह और मूंछों पर ताव देता रह.. ये खुद बात करेगा तेरे से’…
अंग्रेज ने अपनी सफाचट मूछों पर ताव दिया..
चौधरी उठा और अंग्रेज के दो कंटाप जड़े – ‘बिन खेती के ही हल चला रिया है तू ..?’


थोड़ी देर बाद एक मराठी आ के बैठ गया …
बच्चा : ‘भाई ये मराठी है …’
अंग्रेज : ‘इससे बात कैसे करूँ ?’
बच्चा : ‘इससे बोल कि बाम्बे बहुत बढ़िया ..’
अंग्रेज ने मराठी से यही बोल दिया..
मराठी उठा और थप्पड़ लगाया – “साले बाम्बे नहीं मुम्बई … समझा क्या”


थोड़ी देर बाद एक गुजराती सामने आकर बैठ गया।
बच्चा : ‘भाई ये गुजराती है …’
अंग्रेज गाल सहलाते हुए : ‘इससे कैसे बात करूँ ?’
बच्चा : ‘इससे बोल सोनिया गांधी जिंदाबाद …’
अंग्रेज ने गुजराती से यही कह दिया
गुजराती ने कसकर घूंसा मारा – ‘नरेन्द्र मोदी जिंदाबाद…एक ही विकल्प- मोदी’..


थोड़ी देर बाद एक सरदार जी आकर बैठ गए ।
बच्चा : ‘देख भाई ये पंजाबी है …’
अंग्रेज ने कराहते हुए पूछा – ‘इससे कैसे बात करूँ ..’
बच्चा : ‘बात न कर बस पूछ ले कि 12 बज गए क्या ?’
अंग्रेज ने ठीक यही किया …
अंग्रेज : ‘ओ सरदार जी 12 बज गए क्या ?
सरदार जी ने आव देखा न ताव अंग्रेज को उठा के नीचे पटक दिया…
सरदार : साले खोतया नू … तेरे को मैं मनमोहन सिंह लगता हूँ जो चुप रहूँगा’….


पहले से परेशान अंग्रेज बिलबिला गया .
खीझ के बच्चे से बोला : इन सबसे मिलवा दिया अब यूपीवालो से भी मिलवा दो’

बच्चा बोला – “इतनी देर से तेरे को पिटवा कौन रहा । है….!” .

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Source: Said in jest without offence to anyone, from drpuneetagrawal.blogspot.in and image from timeanddate.com

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